Romantic Relationships

What does it mean to start and build a romantic relationship in midlife? Howard and John discuss their real experiences.

00:30 We’re talking about romantic relationships
1:00 What do romantic relationships mean?
1:30 Howard had a vasectomy five years ago
2:50 Why do we think immediately about sex
3:30 Howard discusses sex and his current relationship
7:25 No relationship can meet all of your needs
8:50 How are romantic relationships different in midlife?
11:50 Why didn’t Howard ever want to get married?
13:45 Online dating is perfect for people over 40
15:23 Only 10 percent of people are datable
16:45 I would rather be struck by lightning than have another drink with you.
18:08 What did you learn from more than 100 online dates?
20:12 Partnership vs relationship
21:35 I’m not going to replace your child’s father
22:40 What is a romantic relationship?
24:00 You can’t have a life do-over
25:35: I don’t have the insecurities I had when I was in my 20s
26:30 John has been married for 10 years. Has John met Rachel’s expectations?
28:00 Relationship manuals don’t exist
29:00 John wanted to form a new family, not be subsumed into an existing family
30:00 John’s relationship benefitted from counseling
31:00 John: the best relationships are friendships, first
32:45 Dating women who are divorced with children
34:05 The magical beginning of a relationship
35:18 Children have veto power in a relationship
37:00 You’re not just dating the mom, you’re dating the family
40:50: Heartbreak in midlife
45:00 Heartbreak during marriage?
48:00 Self protective lizard brain
51:25 How boring are we?
51:50 Clean Cookie Company
53:55 Howard says taking care of your physical self is essential for a good relationship. And edibles don’t hurt
56:40 John says pushing through the difficulties in a relationship will generate rewards

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